Understanding those angry outbursts

What can we do to help our angry kids?

Although anxiety is undoubtedly what I get asked about the most, then low self-esteem, anger is third on the list. Mums are confused by the first two and sympathetic but anger makes them mad. They tend to respond by

• shouting louder

• punishing them by removing phones etc.

But let me share something with you.

These do not work

Why?

1. Your child did not wake up that morning intending to get angry. It is not pleasant for them. They love you and do not want to annoy you or upset you. They are fundamentally not ‘making’ they are frustrated because they are not being heard and can’t think of any other way to be heard by you than shouting or throwing stuff. Yes it’s attention seeking but there’s a deeper sadder reason for it which we need to understand. In that moment they feel unloved.

2. They are young and feel confused by their world, their friends, expectations from you and from teachers, they feel overwhelmed and cannot manage these extreme emotions. The pressure can be intense and they just don’…